Dear Former Vice President Gore,

First of all let me congratulate you on winning this year's Nobel Peace Prize.  Of course, that accomplishment would be so much more meaningful if the award hadn't become synonymous with the "Annual Best Politically Correct Jerkwad" award, which the Nobel Committee seems to have merged their award with. I suppose, however, that sharing this honor with the last American to win the prize, former President Jimmy Carter, gives you a real sense of just what this honor means, and how your legacy will be cherished in your decline.

But I have a serious question for you.  What in hell does your Global Warming crusade have to do with promoting Peace on Earth™? I mean do you believe that the only way to stop war is to make it so cold that we'd all rather stay in our own caves rather than shoot someone? Or maybe you believe that anecdotal psychology theory that aggression (which is of course, anti-peace by definition) increases as the temperatures rise? Let's grant for the purposes of this argument that your incoherent, incomplete, and hypocritical pseudoscience is correct, and that people DO make the Earth warmer by a significant amount. Given that, your crusade against Global Warming is admirable, even, perhaps noble. But this is the Nobel PEACE Prize. Not the Nobel "Make the Earth Happy" Prize. It's October, not Earth Day. Explain to me how your actions have anything to do with peace.

Unless somehow being against global warming is really just a fancy synonym for "Troops out of Iraq Now".... because that has something to do with peace. But it really doesn't rise to the level of a Nobel Prize. And here I speak from experience. I went to Caltech. I've met Nobel Laureates. I've been taught by them. And here's the thing: They are FREAKING BRILLIANT. They are committed to their science without any hope of reward, which is what Alfred Nobel left the $$ to recognize in the first place: tireless champions of the greater good, representing different disciplines of the Humanities and Sciences. Not attention seeking environmental hypocrites who champion the environment because it is a safe niche to occupy in the cutthroat social darwinist biosphere of US politics.

I have another question, but this one is for the Nobel Committee, so be sure you pass it along to them when you go for the medal ceremony: If algore has contributed significantly to "Peace on Earth", then why did you recognize him for the Global Warming Awareness crusade? I would think his MOST significant achievements lie in other fields. After all, he invented the internet, technology which has contributed more towards interpersonal, international, and intercultural understanding than any other scientific or humanitarian contribution of the modern age. Isn't that important enough?

I know you're a busy man, especially as you now have to plan a trip to Oslo and contemplate running for President again to add to your incredibly busy fundraising schedule, so I'll close here. However, in closing, I'd like to thank you for the endless amusement you and your family have provided me over the years, not mention answering my questions about the top speed of a Prius (let your son know how much I appreciated that one, will you?). Keep it up!

Best,
CTG

Posted by: caltechgirl at 09:47 AM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
Post contains 568 words, total size 3 kb.

1 You didn't miss a thing with this one - ROTFL!!!

Posted by: Greta at October 12, 2007 09:51 AM (Xl4tG)

2 *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP*

Posted by: Janette at October 12, 2007 10:21 AM (5R+zg)

3 Heh.

Posted by: Richmond at October 12, 2007 10:47 AM (tBuZu)

4 Damn girl; next time tell us how you really feel.

Posted by: Stacy at October 12, 2007 11:06 AM (92p8H)

5 Price of a Prius: $22,175 Price of a Nobel "Peace" Prize: $3.6 million CalTechGirl Skewering Al Gore like a hunk of meat on a shish kebab: Priceless

Posted by: Phoenix at October 12, 2007 11:26 AM (4N2f4)

6 you rock!

Posted by: wRitErsbLock at October 12, 2007 11:27 AM (+MvHD)

7 As we say in Cuban-ese, Te la comiste!

Posted by: Amanda at October 12, 2007 11:49 AM (ay+rD)

8 "top speed of a Prius..." ROFLMAO! Well said!

Posted by: Teresa at October 12, 2007 12:59 PM (rVIv9)

9 BRAVO BRAVO!! Excellent. I do so want to know what global warming has to do with...world peace? Albore will never answer this and neither will his friends who participated in this fiasco.

Posted by: Raven at October 12, 2007 07:58 PM (BvJsz)

10 Hi Caltech Girl, First of all I LOVE reading things from Techers. They are the best! I am shamelessly prejudiced, since my own Techer received his undergrad and grad degrees in EE from sunny Pasadena. He loved his Page House experience too. I am also waiting to see if an MIT girl will also surface with similar sentiments. My other son just graduated from this illustrious Cambridge institution, yet I favor Caltech. In any event, you sound like you have a great head on your shoulders and are NOT infected with the usual PC liberal left (cesspool) mindset. Let the liberal, self appointed elite know that NOT everyone is fooled by their self promotion.

Posted by: Adina Kutnicki at October 15, 2007 10:36 AM (d/RyS)

11 "Of course, that accomplishment would be so much more meaningful if the award hadn't become synonymous with the "Annual Best Politically Correct Jerkwad" award" -when i picked myself up off the floor, i realized i'm going to be laughing at that for an awfully long time. Kudos.

Posted by: still Unreal... at October 16, 2007 08:34 AM (8dDAl)

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