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Having a Spaz...

Seems the Brits are up in arms because Tiger Woods, in a post-Masters interview, said that he "putted like a Spaz".

See, in Britain, they call children with Cerebral Palsy "spastics".  Spaz being a derogatory form of the above.

But then again, Tiger, you've got no reason to worry, after all, these are the same folks who call their smokes "faggots".

Posted by: caltechgirl at 11:12 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Revenge: a dish best served scampi-style

Don't screw with Ellison... or his friends:

It was early 1977, and my friend Mel was getting ready to move away.

Mel was one of the first friends I made when I moved to Sweat City in 1974, there to begin my career at the Great Corporate Salt Mine. He, like I, worked in Baytown, at a research facility set in the fringes of a monstrous oil refinery and chemical plant. He, like I, was a Jew from the Northeast, adrift in this land of Texans.

[...]

But put all this aside for the moment. Mel lived in an apartment complex in what was then considered West Houston - a hellacious commute to Baytown, in fact even more hellacious than my own. And it was the fashion, back in those days, to have Asshole Neighbors.....

Read all about how the Asshole Neighbors got everything they so richly deserved here....

Posted by: caltechgirl at 10:33 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Welcome to California

So as not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, and Texan jokes...

You know you're from California if:

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

2. You make over $400,000 and still can't afford a house.

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.

4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Flower.

5. You can't remember . . is pot illegal?

6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian!

8. You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?

9. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

10. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

11. Unlike back home, the smug bastard at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS George Clooney. 

12. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

13. You can't remember . . . .is pot illegal?

14. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH."

15. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cell phones or pagers.

16. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather related accidents.

17. HEY!!!! Is pot illegal????

18. Both you AND your dog have therapists.

19. The Terminator is your governor.

20. If you drive illegally, they take your driver's license away. If you're here illegally, they want to give you one.

via an email from the CaltechMom!

Posted by: caltechgirl at 01:53 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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Everything you ever wanted to know but were afraid to ask....

...about the Super Adventure Club, according to Tommy Boy himself!

Be sure to turn up the sound and click ALL the links.

Courtesy of Samantha B.

Posted by: caltechgirl at 12:05 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Office Vocabulary

Basil posted this, but I have the original memo...

TO ALL EMPLOYEES:

It has been brought to the management's attention that some individuals have been using foul language in the course of normal conversation between employees. Due to complaints from some more easily offended workers, this conduct will no longer be tolerated.

The management does, however, realize the importance of each person being able to properly express their feelings when communicating with their fellow employees. Therefore the management has compiled the following code phrases, so that the proper exchange of ideas and information can continue unabated.

Old Phrase	New Phrase
No f*cking way	I'm not certain that's feasible.
You've got to be sh*tting me	Really?
Tell someone who gives a f*ck	Perhaps you should check with ...
Ask me if I give a f*ck	Of course I'm concerned.
It's not my f*cking problem	I wasn't involved in that project.
What the f*ck?	That's interesting behavior.
F*ck it, it won't work	I'm not sure I can implement this.
Why the f*ck didn't you tell me that sooner?	I'll try to schedule that.
When the f*ck do you expect me to do this?	Perhaps I can work late.
Who the f*ck cares?	Are you sure it's a problem?
He's got his head up his a$$	He's not familiar with that problem.
Eat sh*t	You don't say.
Eat sh*t and die	Excuse me?
Eat sh*t and die motherf*cker	Excuse me, sir?
What the f*ck do they want from me?	They weren't happy with it?
Kiss my a$$	So you'd like help with it?
F*ck it. I'm on salary	I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
Shove it up your a$$	I don't think you understand.
This job sucks	I love a challenge.
Who the hell died and made you boss?	You want me to take care of this?
Blow me	I see.
Blow yourself	Do you see?
Another f*cking meeting	Yes, we should discuss this.
I really don't give a sh*t	I don't think it will be a problem.
F*ck you	How nice.
F*ck you sideways	How very nice.
He's a f*cking pr*ck.	He's somewhat insensitive.
She's a ball busting bitch.	She's an aggressive go getter.
You don't know what the f*ck you're doing.	I think you could use more training.

Posted by: caltechgirl at 11:37 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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More to come

Of course, as is usual, I have lots to talk about but no damn time.

Watch this space for my thoughts on body image, insomnia, and maybe immigration (if I feel like raising my blood pressure...)

Posted by: caltechgirl at 10:45 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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...Contact, it's the answer, it's the reason, that everything happens...

3, 2, 1

Go to Wikipedia and look up your birth day (excluding the year). List three events, two births and one death, including the year.

On November 10:
Events:
1766 - The last Colonial governor of New Jersey, William Franklin, signs the charter of Queen's College (later renamed Rutgers University).

1871 - Henry Morton Stanley locates missing explorer and missionary, Dr. David Livingstone in Ujiji, near Lake Tanganyika saying "Dr. Livingstone, I presume?"

1938 - Kate Smith, on her weekly radio show, sings Irving Berlin's God Bless America for the first time.

Births:
1483 - Martin Luther, German protestant reformer (d. 1546)

1775 -The Continental Congress passes a resolution creating the Continental Marines (later renamed the United States Marine Corps) to serve as landing troops for the recently created Continental Navy.
Ok, that was technically not a birth, so how about my favorite movie helicopter pilot? (bonus points if you know the movie...)

1932 - Roy Scheider, American actor

Death:
1982 - Leonid Brezhnev, ruler of the Soviet Union (b. 1906)

seen everywhere, first here

Oh, and more bonus points if you know what the title of this post means

Posted by: caltechgirl at 10:18 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Dell capitulates

Of course it only took about 30 blogposts all over the b'sphere, a couple of mentions by the big dogs and (what probably did it) a threatened lawsuit.

Dell was wrong.  But they evidently made it good when Dana backed them into a corner.  Between my own Dell horror story, and this one, don't ever by a freaking Dell.  I won't do it again.

Congratulations, sister.  You beat them down.  And double-check the length of the warranty.  If it's a completely new box you should have a new warranty...

Posted by: caltechgirl at 09:59 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Happy Birthday!

To Velocidude!

Feel better soon, my friend!

Posted by: caltechgirl at 09:52 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Round-Up

Evidently Miller's Time is just a metaphor for time on your hands.....

From Miller's Time, a Bear Flag League roundup....

Posted by: caltechgirl at 09:48 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Did I mention?

Scroll down a bit.
Look on the left sidebar.
Click the Black and Red flag. Especially if you're a South Park fan or an anti-Tomkat apostle.

Xenu is your friend....

Posted by: caltechgirl at 05:42 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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That's Reassuring...

You scored as Natural Causes. Your death will be by natural causes, though not by any diseaese, because that is another option on this test. You will probably just silently pass away in the night from old age, and people you love won't realize until the next morning, when you are all purple and cold and icky. So be happy, you won't be murdered. Natural Causes 80% Posion 80% Suicide 67% Bomb 67% Gunshot 60% Disease 60% Suffocated 47% Accident 33% Drowning 27% Stabbed 27% Eaten 20% Cut Throat 20% Disappear 13% How Will You Die?? created with QuizFarm.com

From Disappearing Ben

Posted by: caltechgirl at 07:29 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Happy MuNuversary to me!

One year ago today I hung up the Blogger training wheels and jumped full time to the MuNuvian intergalactic star cruiser.

In honor of that, a new look around here.

Between the blogrolls, buttons and pics, it was just getting too damn long to scroll down, so now we have 3 columns....

At the top, rotating banners are back, so refresh for your favorites.

Also, there's a new random scrolling quote for your amusement. Taking suggestions for new additions!

In the Left sidebar:                                   In the Right sidebar:
About Me                                                      My Blog Family
SuDoku                                                         Bloggers I've met
Hockey Whoopass Jamboree                    My Blogroll
Lots'a buttons                                               BFL Blogroll
(be sure to click the black/red flag)          Tartan Blogs Blogroll
Clock                                                             Code Red Blogroll
Calendar                                                           MedBlogs Blogroll
More info
Search
Recent Entries
More buttons
SiteMeter etc.
Munuvian Blogroll
Cotillion Blogroll
Categories
Archives
Copyright and Disclaimer

Posted by: caltechgirl at 09:44 PM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
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Blue Monday....

Your Lucky Underwear is Blue

You are caring and extroverted. You've made relationships your number one focus, and your lucky blue underwear can bring some balance to them. You thrive in one-on-one situations. You are a good listener and a natural born therapist. Sometimes you let the concerns of others become too important in your life, leading to stress and worry. If you want more balance, put on your blue underpants. They'll help you take care of yourself first.

Found here

Posted by: caltechgirl at 09:13 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Strange Sightings

(title lifted from here)

On the freeway this morning I drove by two unusual vehicles....
One of these:

Turns out it was a "studio vehicle," no doubt on its way to a shoot somewhere;

and the delivery van from this place, which was of course, featured on this show.

Posted by: caltechgirl at 01:08 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Hell Officially Frozen Over!

I agree with something said on Kos and Atrios....
From this article:

"Sitting in the oncology ward at Children's National Medical Center on Jan. 19, retired Adm. Joe Sestak and his wife, Susan, awaited the doctors' verdict about the condition of their 5-year-old daughter, Alexandra.

She had been diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor last summer and given three to nine months to live. The Sestaks lived for four months in the ward. They watched as their daughter survived three surgeries, and as she endured chemotherapy.

But that winter day, doctors told the Sestaks that Alexandra had done remarkably well and that, although the cancer could reemerge, she could resume living like a healthy girl.

Relieved and grateful, Sestak, who retired as a three-star admiral Jan. 1, after 31 years in the Navy, began thinking about what he wanted to do next.

...

"He's running because he has a personal ax to grind with the Navy leadership," [Rep. Curt] Weldon [(R), PA] said. "When you treat people like dirt, that's an issue."

Weldon [also] attacked Sestak's decision to continue owning a home in Virginia while only renting in Pennsylvania and questioned why Sestak did not move back to Pennsylvania when he was working at the Pentagon. Weldon commutes from Pennsylvania each day.

Weldon also suggested Sestak should have sent his daughter to a hospital in Philadelphia or Delaware, rather than the Washington hospital. Sestak said that as soon as doctors give his daughter the all-clear, he'll buy in Pennsylvania."[emphasis mine - Ed.]

Jesus, you don't attack a man for where he chooses to treat his five year-old daughter's cancer!  That is BEYOND the pale.

No, I'm not going to link to Kos or Atrios, I don't need the trolls.  You can find the links here.

The thing is, both sides do this and I am F***ING tired of it.  There's no reason to deal these kind of low blows.  Toot your own horn, explain why your opponent's policy platform is wrong, and let it go at that.  That should give the voters plenty of reasons to make their decision.

Or maybe there's just nothing worthwhile to say.  In which case, my mother taught me to shut up.

Posted by: caltechgirl at 12:49 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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It's Tartan Day!

The day to celebrate one's own Scots Heritage!
As for myself, we're Scots and Scots Irish in my maternal grandfather's line, and are evidently from Clan MacDuff, and this is the MacDuff hunting tartan

Here are this year's participants:


(Mmm, Haggis! denotes a new post!)

If it's not Scottish, it's crap!

Posted by: caltechgirl at 10:06 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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He's Here!

RP and his Viking Bride have welcomed a new Boy Child into the family. Mom and Babe are both well.

Hooray!

Posted by: caltechgirl at 10:19 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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